When a Twin Has Developmental Delays or Disabilities

by Terri Mobbs

Parents of multiples are already overwhelmed with the extra care required of more than one baby, but when one or both children are disabled, the challenges can become particularly acute. Terri Mobbs, mother of identical twin boys, one of whom has cerebral palsy, has some advice to share with parents who have a disabled child.

• Enjoy their bond as twins, but also treat them as two separate, individual children with different interests and needs

• Find a support group online or in your area

• Use your typical child as a peer teacher, but do not compare skills

• Communicate physical abilities or limitations to other children and others around you

• Keep your marriage a priority and work together

• Spend time individually with each child doing what he or she wants to do

• Be prepared for opposition to keep the twins together in educational settings

• Take time to grieve the loss of your dreams, but do not stay there

• Develop standard responses to the questions you receive in public about your twins (Are they twins? Then why isn't he walking? What is wrong with him? etc.)

• Get information and medical services that are available for children with special needs

Terri Mobbs is a wife and stay-at-home mom to a daughter and twin boys, one of which has delays due to Twin to Twin Transfusion Syndrome. She is an active volunteer at her church and local twins club. She currently resides in LaVergne, Tennessee.