By Lisa Cartolano
It is simply amazing! From the
moment you lay eyes on your newborn bundle(s) of joy, your life suddenly
changes. How could someone so tiny and helpless make such an incredible impact
so quickly? Babies have the unique ability to steal your heart, challenge your
abilities, and can turn your world upside down if you let them. Having a baby
(or two or three) is an absolutely wonderful change that will necessitate some
changes in your way of doing things. As many seasoned parents have probably
already informed you, your lifestyle will need quite a few modifications. Here
are some suggestions that will make your adjustment a little bit easier.
Get Organized!
As painful as this thought may be for the more spontaneous among us, getting and staying organized can make the difference between riding a tidal wave and getting hit by one. Not only will you be able to better meet the needs of your children, but you may even have some time left over for yourself. You'll thank yourself for it!
Buy in Bulk
Take an inventory of non-perishable products that you are most likely to
use. Whether it be diapers or everyday household items and foods, stock up when
there is a sale. Eliminate those last minute dashes to the store to purchase
necessities or forgotten items by keeping close track of your stock. Faithfully
keep an ongoing shopping list on your refrigerator door and get into the habit
of writing down an item as soon as the need for it arises or it begins to run
low. When it comes to baby goods, many items such as diapers and formula can be
bought by the case.
Keep It Neat and Easy
How do you keep your home from looking like a disaster at the end of a long day of devoting your efforts to taking care of your baby or babies? Take as many shortcuts as possible. During the day, soak dirty dishes in a tub of warm soapy water in the sink until you can get around to cleaning them. Use clear plastic tubs to store children's small and medium sized toys. (Labeling these clear tubs with a word or picture will help children learn to locate and put away toys.) Use separate hampers for white, light and dark laundry to avoid sorting. Have designated spots for important items, such as keys, pocketbooks, checkbooks, and pacifiers. (Try your best to return these items to their set location to avoid daily scavenger hunts for them.) Organize your home to help make your job and your life easier.
Learn How to Say Yes
When people offer you assistance, say
YES! Parenting, and especially parenting multiples, is a very humbling
experience, so learn to swallow your pride and realize the physical and mental
limitations of being a SuperMom or SuperDad. Even the most independent people
need help sometimes. You will enjoy being a more rested and less stressed
parent. Don't be ashamed to ask family and friends, as well as trusted
neighbors, mother's helpers, school or church volunteers for a hand. Let people
take your grocery list to the store with them (after all, when will you be able
to get there in the near future?), run errands, feed a baby or two or simply
just give you time to take a well deserved nap or read a book. Burning yourself
out trying to do it all is simply no good for you or the little ones who depend
on you.
Learn How to Say No
Likewise, it is important to know your limitations. If you are unable to entertain guests or attend functions due to exhaustion, tactfully let the party know that you would like to have done so under different circumstances, but you simply cannot do it at this time. For some people, learning how to say no takes time and practice, but it is a necessary skill to avoid burnout. On the other hand, try if possible to get out of the house regularly or on special occasions to refresh yourself and take a short break from the world of diapers and formula. Spending time with friends or family can be uplifting and just the boost you need to get you through the rest of the day or week.
Be Realistic
Especially difficult for the perfectionists and over-achievers among us is
learning to set small and realistic goals. Your expectations need to adapt to
your new and changing lifestyle. Simply taking care of your babies' basic
feeding, burping, diapering and comforting needs, especially in those early
weeks of infancy, is enough of a daily challenge. You are not a poor parent
because your house looks like a small tornado has passed through it or because
you don't know why your babies are crying. Focusing on overcoming those daily
hurdles will keep you busy enough without having to worry about perfection.
Stay Alert for Special
Discounts and Programs
Many baby companies and government agencies have special programs designed for parents of multiples. They can include anything from discount coupons to free supplies for baby. Don't be shy about asking. Contact your pediatrician, check with local multiples organizations, call toll free baby company hotlines, check multiples magazines and inquire in retail stores for possible discounts.
NOTE: Take
Time to Enjoy
All work and no play makes for a very exhausted and stressed out parent.
Make it a point to regularly set aside time for yourself to do something you
enjoy, whether alone or with others. Think of it as a mini vacation, even if it
is for a few minutes a day. Likewise, remember that your babies themselves can
be a source of rejuvenation. Sometimes we get so overwhelmed with the burping,
feeding, changing regime that we forget to make time to enjoy playing with our
children. There is nothing that can brighten your day like a baby smiling,
laughing or cooing at you. Babies grow up before you know it, so why not try to
enjoy every moment while you can? It is especially wonderful to leave the
camcorder out and ready to shoot so that you can record little snippets here
and there of your babies' latest and cutest feats. Just taking five minutes
every so often makes for a beautiful chronicle of babies' first years.
Especially after a long and difficult day, it is rewarding to watch a few
precious moments of your little ones at their best.
©2008 Lisa Cartolano. Reprinted with permission.
About Lisa Cartolano
Lisa Cartolano is a certified, tenured Elementary School teacher with a Masters Degree in Teaching. Lisa is a mother of five children, and currently works at home providing online educational resources for parents of infants, multiples, toddlers and school-age children. She is the founder of Little Ones, an educational online resource designed to assist parents facing the challenges of educating young children from infancy through the elementary years and beyond. The Little Ones' mission is to provide parents with the information and tools necessary to actively support children on their journey to becoming more productive and successful learners. Whether it be through promoting well-selected, educationally sound products, encouraging the development of efficient work and study habits, or simply advising parents of the most effective learning strategies, Little Ones will be a valuable resource for the creation of more stimulating and enjoyable learning experiences for both you and your child. Visit http://www.littleones.com.